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" Andy said with a devilish smile. "You know," Pat began, "candy apple red is definitely your color."They all laughed. Pat started in with some foundation and blush in generous amounts. I suddenly got a revelation. "I don't look anything like Sam in the face. I sent the buyer head shots. He's gonna check my face at some point." I said. I was still bowled over by my new voice.Andy had just finished applying the permanent blue eyeshadow and mascara to my eyes and drew on some fake eyebrows."You will be wearing this," said Andy, holding up the leather hood, "and we took the liberty of intercepting the pictures you sent to the buyer and replacing them with some of our own."She held up some photos while Pat held up a mirror to my face. I couldn't believe the reflection. Staring back at me was the hottest Asian hooker I'd ever seen. They had done such an incredible job with the make-up that I doubted my own mother would recognize me. I then looked over at her photos and saw that. Her pile of shit matte black RX-7 was parked out front. She stood there chewing gum, looking up at me with one arched eyebrow, much like a bored teenager. "Got it in one genius. Right, this, this right here is a one off thing do not get used to it!" "What the hell are you talking about Lisa, you come banging on my door at..." Lisa cut me off quick smart. "Shut up! Okay, this endless dance we engage in on that stupid fucking facebook ends right now. We flirt, throw intellectual barbs at each other and discuss some really intense shit. We pretend we are sensible adults who can have a deep conversation without wanting to fuck each other, we bring up our partners and sign out. It's bullshit!" Lisa nudged past me, shouldering her leather jacket off. My eyes were clapped onto her fabulous ass in that tight skirt. "So okay, that's cool, do you want a magnum?" She rounded on me, whipping that awesome hair of hers around and said, "No, I want you to fuck me!"I stood there with a chewed ice.
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